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“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”—A. A. Milne
This pretty much sums up my mother’s perspective on life. I jokingly refer to her as the Virgin Mary who married James Dean; DorisDay to Elvis Presley; Pollyanna to Fonzie. The woman in my life who really dosen’t focus on the bad in a situation, rather the possibilities.
And don’t confuse optimism with ignorance. Valedictorian of her high school, double major from Mizzou—in a day when most girls didn’t attend college–masters degree and outwitting her 8th grade English students to keep the students in line all attest to her wisdom & intelligence.
Maybe the preparation for her military life started the day she was given a big, black Pirate patch to wear over her good eye to make her “lazy”eye work. The kids at school called her just that – Pirate, and she took the taunting as affirmation, acceptance & a badge of coolness because what isn’t cool about getting to dress up like a Pirate every day??? She was a Pirate! Arghh! Not a special needs child.
So when she met my Triumph-riding, jeans/undershirt/leather jacket-wearing Marine dad who might be sent to Vietnam, she embraced their relationship not the possible military hardships. When the Marine Corp created their wills while at officer training for his impending deployment, she stoically acknowledged her worry and continued living chin up.
Thirteen months of blue letters, toddler crying every night for her daddy, daily body count reports, panicky moments whenever an official looking black car rolled into a pickup town, official looking black cars arriving in town and setting up a home with the help of a sister not a husband were handled with dignity, thankfulness for her family all around & a countdown to the end of 395 days.
Then the third world country assignment to Morocco. She could have stayed behind. There are all kinds of diseases there after all. Yet, she chose again to see the good side of the deployment; an exotic location, adventure & excitement of the unknown.
She’s been lucky for sure, mostly because she sees herself as lucky instead of challenged. A lesson I am thankful to have learned from my Military Spouse Mom.
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